Money… Good 3: The Madness of Charlie Sheen
Posted on April 12, 2011 by Grymm

Grymm Ramblings

Hi. How ya doin'? We gotta have a quick and succinct and serious chat. I've been doin' the whole "online artist" thing for a good ten years now and I like making sure that the lines of communication are nice and clearly understood. That said, the following of what I'm going to say is bare bones. No fluff. No exaggeration. No manipulation. No guilt. Because I despise all such things. Look over to the right of the page. Your right. See that Walrus head? It says "DONATE". Its clickable. That's the new thing to hit to donate funds to the Walrus. Unlike before the hosting shift, it now goes directly to an account specifically made for the Walrus. No more of that shit where it went to my own personal account.

What would your donations be used for? Paying the monthly hosting costs and the annual domain costs. Basically if every major repeat Walrus commenter donate a single dollar each month, we'd never ever have to worry about the costs of running the site. Alternatively, if every single reader we have donated one dollar every month we'd probably be able to warrant turning the Walrus into a Monday, Wednesday, Friday comic.

Am I trying to guilt you constant commenters into donating anything? No. That could feasibly be a very quick way to lose you. Am I saying that if we don't get donations we'll shut down? No. I'm not saying that either. What I'm saying is the more donations we can receive in a month, the less we have to stress about things and the more focus we can put on simply making comics, videos, and entertaining you folks.

 

Musings of a CreepKnight

So... Charlie Sheen. I know that it's pretty much old hat now and that everyone's getting sick and tired of hearing about the son of a bitch. But here at Voodoo Walrus we're fans of old hats, and no matter how frayed or bent they might get we'll just keep on wearing them until they fall apart.

I'm not going to accuse Charlie Sheen of stealing material from us. At one point I might have. I may also have suggested we change the comic's tag line from "More Than a Barrel Full of Monkeys" to "Charlie Sheen's Favorite Web Comic." But for the sake of legal purposes, neither of these things actually happened. But I do think it mighty odd that ole' Carlos Esteves has been going around saying things that sound strangely like things I've been writing for the last seven years. And worse, they're all out of context. If you think "Secret Vatican Warlock Assassin" is funny, you should have seen it in context, when it was "N.O.R.M: Secret Vatican Warlock Assassin." If you think the consumption of Tiger's blood is hilarious, you should have read about it in a script I wrote wear a professional-monster-hunter-who-shall-remain-nameless was actively hunting a tiger for his blood in order to defeat the elusive Jersey Devil. In fact, after going over my scripts for the past few weeks and taking a good hard look at all the things I've written, I'd say it's fair to say that...

... Charlie Sheen should hire me on as his personal writer. Then maybe he wouldn't have been boo'ed in Detroit.

And then I'd have money.

I like money.

I also like food. But that costs money.

 

OH AND ONE MORE THING... So how many of you out there really want one of the various Voodoo Walrus t-shirt designs, but just can't see putting down nearly $30 to buy one from our Red Bubble shop? Moreover, how many of you know that out of that $20-$30 the Walrus receives maybe a couple bucks and you just can't reason giving your hard earned cash over to the corporate machine even if it does mean snagging an awesome shirt? Well, we have a solution everybody. We've found a t-shirt printer that we know for a fact does awesome quality work and its affordable and allows for us to sell directly to you! Here's the trick though. We gotta place a bulk order. So we'd have to do some kind of pre-order type thing and see if enough of you actually want to buy shirts so the that printing cost can even be made in the first place! Basically what we're currently thinking is doing the Cthulhu top hat design this way. Your cost for the shirt would run about $15 to $20. Its really all based on size as anything over 2x costs more to manufacture. So we need to know sizes too.  Maybe a buck or two more depending on if you want a 3x size or larger. So comment below. Let us know if there's interest. Even if you're not a regular commenter. Especially if you're not a regular commenter. If we have more than right people interested, we can get things rolling and start up a preorder maybe on Friday. But seriously, YOU have to let US know that this is something you want, otherwise it can't happen since we'd have to take the money from your orders and use that to fund the shirt printing. And if this works we can start looking into making this the regular process and move on to getting Walrus head shirts and the infamous, not yet released "I WANNA FUCK 'N ROAR!"  Shmeerm shirt made.

56 thoughts on “Money… Good 3: The Madness of Charlie Sheen”

  1. CreepKnight

    It’s 12:15 in the AM bitches! Where’s my comments? WHERE’S MY COMMENTS?!!

    1. CreepKnight

      After all, you’ve had fifteen whole minutes…

      1. CreepKnight

        If you guys don’t comment soon, I’m gonna change the comic. Put a new one up there…

        1. Rose

          I was off beating corporate monopolies into giving me money.

        2. Marchosias

          I was scalping corporate heads for Native Americans. They like me.

      2. Akonite

        I was out molesting busty geek women damnit! Keep your britches on….at least until I’m there to molest you too.

        *shrug* I’m an equal opportunity geek molester.

  2. Vensik

    I’m in your computer…

    1. Vensik

      Is that really a folder of midgets with farm animals porn?

      1. Vensik

        Oh my god I’m never eating beef again…

        1. CreepKnight

          Just don’t go into the folder marked “Shit Vensik Should Never See.”

    2. CreepKnight

      … and you can all thank Vensik for getting to see this comic. Cause I got about a hundred CK&C comics sitting on my hard drive…

      Remember who it is that is awesome, and who it is that… is… aw damn. I need caffeine.

      Anyone else notice the trend that when CK doesn’t get his caffeine he shares his pain in the comments section?

      Discuss.

      1. Vensik

        Welcome, back to finishing this liquidation request.

      2. Grymm

        Fucking christ. You never told me that many CreepKnight and Crows got made! How is it that they all survived like three complete computer-pocalypses and yet master files for the Bowler & Mac Sexy Beach Party full comic were lost?

        1. Akonite

          because the awesome shit is what the cyber-goblins crave and destroy our computers to get to.

          Same reason I’ll put money on if this thing ever bricks on me I’ll be able to recover all the pictures of my guyfriends being idiots but not a damn one of the blackmail worthy photos.

        2. Grymm

          Indeed. redundant back ups are a good and glorious thing and have since been a staple of the studio and the office.

        3. Vensik

          Got your message… I will try to call you tomorrow.

        4. Grymm

          No worries! Things are fixed now. A man with an awesome beard and goggles on his head came to my rescue and rape the problem to death with his hands.

  3. Michael Alexander Reaper

    well I’m late to the party, then again i am an hour behind you all so its still 11:34 but aww well FIRSTIES!!!!
    But Jesus CK never let those CK&C ever see the light of day 4 was enough for my lifetime

    1. Michael Alexander Reaper

      Firsties as a relative term to those NOT in the comic :3

    2. Grymm

      I could’ve sworn Rook posted five of them. Maybe your brain blocked one out.

      1. Michael Alexander Reaper

        Well I do have an antiDERP filter installed into my comp so I should be good for now…

  4. Ticker

    Charlie Sheen is on a new drug. It’s called Charlie Sheen. If anyone besides Charlie Sheen takes Charlie Sheen, their heads would explode.

    That’s just a thing a friend of mine started. Anyways, fuck all of you. Creepknight and crow was awesome and I thank Rook for exposing it to us. Also, PLEASE try to find that beach party comic.

    1. Grymm

      It really wasn’t but so great. It was started back before the Black and white “CreepKnight Birthday Story” so the art really isn’t great to look at. Though it would have been the first technical example of Shmeerm being in his underwear…

      1. Ticker

        Shmeerm was BORN as a masochistic pervert in his underwear.

  5. Will B

    Well great comic gentlemen. Because my finances make the American government seem rich and well spent, I now feel guilty about posting. Will enjoy reading the comics as long they up.

    1. Grymm

      Nope. Don’t feel guilty. You’re not allowed. As previously stated, the whole donation post isn’t meant to guilt anyone. Its just for the purposes of example. There’s no fear of the Walrus going anywhere. Donations or not. We’d just prefer it if we didn’t have to pay the costs out of pocket is all.

      1. Marchosias

        I have a Cthulhu shirt. It’s damn stylish. I wear it often, and have to try to explain it to people. These conversations usually end with “fuck it – go to VoodooWalrus”

        1. Rose

          I desire one of these shirts, curse the world, and the need for money to fix things. I wish they would take souls in payment like Billy. I have plenty of those.

        2. The Devil

          If I may be allowed to play my own advocate here for just a moment…

          Souls – while a gloriously strong standard of currency for situations when paper money and coin simply will not suffice – are not the only thing we bargain with. They also aren’t the single most lucrative item to have in terms of getting what you pay for.

          You’re probably wondering what that item is, aren’t you?
          Yes, yes you are.

          Learn to live with disappointment.

          And, to draw things up nicely, I cannot, nor will I ever, allow The Walrus to accept souls as payment for any goods or services they provide.
          Not only are they dependent upon actual money for their daily lives, but soul trading is not exactly the cleanest, safest, or most efficient way of doing business.

          I like these guys. I like what they do. I like the fact that they’ve come this far under their own steam and with their own talents. I prefer to not have that corrupted.

          *ahem* Apologies, Rose, M’Dear. I was apparently feeling… soapboxy and felt the need to do so as a reply to your reply.

        3. Rose

          *blinks* I was not speaking of the Walrus boys…I wsa speaking of life in general. Trust me. These guys deserve every penny they get. *pats your horny little head* Is fine~

        4. Grymm

          Ye warm our hearts Billy! More so than any tasty hot beverage you could serve could!

        5. Grymm

          There’s really nothing else to say in such situations!

  6. Marron

    Winning.

    I don’t actually wear t-shirts, but I’d buy a Cthulu Top Hat shirt if it helps out.

  7. Rose

    Charlie Sheen…how far thee has fallen, at least he’s stealing from well loved sources that actually provide some entertainment value!

    Very high tech there Vensik, did you steal the power from the matrix hive hardrive?

    1. Grymm

      Nah, he’s just naturally awesome like that.

      1. Vensik

        You know it.

  8. Lance

    Great comic as always, and I feel sorry for Vensik, CK’s computer is one I never want to even see @_@

    1. Vensik

      There are things the minds eye cannot unsee…

      1. CreepKnight

        The pictures of my ballet recital was not that bad.

        1. CreepKnight

          And by pictures I meant “were” and by “was” I meant video.

  9. Michael Alexander Reaper

    you all need to sell hats, i like hats and have for the longest time, I own at least 23 and wear them depending on my mood for that day.

  10. Mercenary Clown

    i has walrus shirts…..i love my bacon shirt…makes me feel all warm and fuzzy when i walk past christians and they gape open mouth when they read the shirt

  11. Michael Alexander Reaper

    Note, if i win lotto i’m gonna shoot a mil to you guys.

  12. Sunshine

    Beating people with sticks and lead pipes what the hell is wrong with you two? You’re barbarians!!! You should use a flounder or put a rabid weasel on the stick. Sticks and lead pipes…damn savages!!

    1. Mercenary Clown

      im a fan of the rabid weasel…well, rabid anything…especially rabid squirrels…why, just the other day i locked someone in my basement with 32 rabid, starving squirrels….was most joyous for me

      1. Marchosias

        Rabid armadillo on a chain. Main objective weapon of true Texans.

    2. Grymm

      To be fair Sunshine, in reality we have moved up to boards with nails in them and trebuchets. But mostly just because we love saying the word “trebuchet”.

  13. Grymm

    Hey everyone. Just letting you know that I’m a bit technologically stranded at the moment. Computer is currently down and I’m accessing a limited number of important sites through a less than preferable machine elsewhere in the castle.

    No worries though. Things should be operational again in the next couple of days as I have an ally helping me get things back up and running . In the meantime, hang tight if you’ve emailed me about anything as I can’t currently access my voodoo walrus email.

    1. Grymm

      Problem seemingly fixed after a couple of false hopes. Its amazing to watch a pro computer person locked in battle with a malicious piece of computer corrupting data. Goggles were involved which let’s one know that l33t haxxors were being done to things.

      1. Vensik

        Lies

  14. Marron

    As an addendum to Grymm’s message above, I just returned from the future, and next week’s Walrus comics were up with no issues, so that must mean everything will be all right.

  15. Grymm

    Computer crisis rectified. I’m back bitches. Rejoice.

    1. Marchosias

      RE-FUCKING-JOICE!

      Caffeine+megalomaniac= screaming. (Not the good kind. You know what the good kind is. This is not it.)

      1. Grymm

        You got ahold of one of the Devil’s Lesser Tasty Tasty Devil Drinks didn’t you? Was there random uncontrollable, unexplainable sobbing involved? That’s the real proof.

        1. Marchosias

          I’ve not had the pleasure of (the) Devil’s concoctions, but staying alert for midnight rituals is taxing in of itself. Why can’t chaos deities just keep business hours? Shotgunning coffee at dusk is no way to start a blood sacrifice.

  16. artbeast

    I think the word is actually “drivel”.
    But, knowing these guys, it may actually be “dribble”.

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